V.

When I ran a workout my back wasn't strong enough for

and my heart almost wasn't,

a Bukowski reading came on of --------- and I couldn't feel

it - but I'm sure I'll feel it later.

I woke up this morning straight on back

as odd as a tree with limbs that bend up, with a recurring

statement running visibly: "I feel sick, I feel sick, I feel

sick." And on the 14th of February: my bloody valentine.

I was thinking I wanted to put on a beautiful red dress

and eat dinner with my friends, but then I didn't have

a parking spot when I got home from work and it made

me mad and I changed my mind.

But then I ate a hot&ready and changed my mind again.

I put on a beautiful red dress, and by the end of the whole

fixed-up&caboodle the feel was something like gangstersex.

The night previous I listened to Dylan with a glass of merlot

left behind from my man. What is more important than this

is the fact that the day previous to this, there was a moment

when I stopped working so hard and wished, "To go home

and he'd be waiting there for me with a bottle of red."

I could kid myself, but all signs have been pointing to Yes.