Snapshots of a Weekend Road Trip

Like a rook I packed a yogurt & wine bottle opener in my carry on. Classic shady passenger items. I read "Flight" by Sherman Alexie which was superb, but was severely distracted by a group of real douchebags on board for Vegas Boy's Trip, which will never seem cool to me. This particular group was hammered, gave the flight attendants hell & started yelling Thank You's to the "towelheads who didn't burn our plane down." I was a second away from unbelting & smacking the sucker in the head. In my opinion, drunk doesn't forgive ignorance. It seemed that beyond this group, everyone else was with their partner in life, with a hundred glinting wedding rings ringing.
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I purchased a shuttle to the Westin, which was a nice change up from the usual hotels I choose in Vegas, compliments of a randomized hotel draw from Des. No great height, lush, smelled delicious & without cigarette smoke choke somehow! I checked us into our room, no lines, just quiet & catering. Our room was King bed, long bathroom, view of ____________ (weird things), giant television. I was dressed in a flowy white tiered dress that bounced as I walked & I felt like I needed to flounce to the grocery store. Went for a couple mile walk as the sun was setting. Purchased chewy candies, chocolate peanut clusters, sushi, red wine & parrot's bay. Munched on my candies as it grew dark, the wind warm, watching all the pretty people in their blistering heels. Back at the hotel, I unpacked, though we'd only be there for 10 hours. Put on a fluffy white robe, started watching Say Yes to the Dress, drinking, by my lonesome the whole bottle of parrots. That stuff is water. I didn't feel a thing except for in stronger encouragement to yell at the brides on television...
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Des' plane was delayed & she wouldn't be in till around 1am, so I just kept drinking, because she got her ass drunk on the plane. I put on a face of makeup, my favorite little low top nude-colored comfy as hell dress, a pair of clear heels & ate my sushi. Eventually she found her way to our room & after a couple touchups, we were on the strip. Encouraged by a lively suited fellow, we followed him to his club, The Bank, where we would find LMFAO djing. As well as floating blow up aliens & all the skank a club could muster. We ordered drinks & danced against the dj booth until after 4am. I stole my mum a purple alien by pretending to dance with it to death. We were starved. I looked down and saw a bunch of blood in my clear heels & saw that I had cut into my toes...so we walked back to the Westin & ordered room service: bleu cheese burger, club sandwich, fries & onion rings. We fell asleep to a cheerleading movie, bellies full, to the morning light in the window.
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Slept for a few hours, packed & then laid by the modest pool for an hour before we'd begin our road trip back to Oregon. Got a bit of color, picked up Des' new car, along with a pit bull named Marley, ate some hawaiian bbq, reminisced about the red rock casino & mountains, then were off in the 106 degree heat. That first day we might have driven like 7 hours, but were exhausted, had a little car mishap, I ate melted chocolate from my fingers, we stopped for In-n-out, drove a bit longer & found a nice little, creepy rest stop to fall asleep at. Rolled newspapers into the windows, kicked the seats back, fell asleep with Marley between us. Sometime around 6am we woke, got ourselves coffees & egg mcmuffins & hashbrowns, drugged the dog for car sickness & took off along the length of california, on into oregon. Slept at Des & Alex's, after a meal of sandwiches, pasta salad & wine prepared for us by Alex. He got us chocolates & Moscato & we had a little girls slumber party watching "Big Love."
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Woke up really early so Des could take me to Portland to catch a train back home. Stopped for delicious mixed coffee beverages at her favorite place of all time: Dutch Brothers. My train turned into a bus, of course, delays up the yang, collapsed bridge & detours, so I just read & wrote until finally, I was home after 3 days, 4 states, a pit bull, a beautiful friend, feeling pretty, soul free. In conclusion: I need a drink.